a hate letter to gluTEN

dear gluten,

you are perfect in every way…

bread, pasta, baked goods, snacks, you name it;

but god you can be such a bitch sometimes.

how is it, that something so wonderful, can hurt so, so bad?

i’ll never forget the day i heard those 3 wretched words:

you. have. celiac.

i began to realize why all of my favorite foods brought me pain with every bite.

i learned that is in fact NOT normal to feel like dying after every meal,

what a novel concept that is.

everytime i think “oh, maybe i grew out of it” i am painfully proven wrong.

what kind of bullshit idea is that?

why on earth would i possibly think you would decide to like me back?

on top of it all, there is no greater feeling of betrayal than being “glutened”.

it’s one thing when i indulge myself, knowing my unpleasant & mortifying fate;

but it’s a whole other ballgame when you sneak into foods i thought were safe.

i’ll never understand why you would choose me of all people to plague.

i’ve always been nothing but good to you.

but i guess we’ll never know.

so for now, here’s a big “fuck you too!”



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