i’m not about to self-incriminate, so here’s a bunch of weird things about me/i do that my roommate thinks shouldn’t get me in aka all my red flags:
- i don’t sleep with a top sheet
- retail therapy (when real therapy isn’t cutting it)
- self-deprecating humor
- i say non-casual things in a very casual way
- didn’t use a duvet cover for the last 18 years, just the comforter
- eats cucumbers like they’re apples
- sometimes i find random hairs in my fridge
- towel hook broke a week ago and i’ve just let my wet towels marinate on the floor of my dorm room
- my birth name is fotini…
- photoshopped myself & sent it to my grandma b/c she was mad i hadn’t gone to the greek church here yet
- cooks ravioli in a water boiler tea kettle thing
- hasn’t cleaned out said kettle in weeks
- has to take prescribed sleep aids bc melatonin just doesn’t cut it anymore
- switched roommates on a random tuesday after only 2 months of being here
- one time i accidentally stole a pack of hot glue sticks from walmart bc i forgot they were in my hand & felt so guilty i mailed them to walmart headquarters along with a 5 page note apologizing & begging them to not arrest me bc i was only 7 & had a big birthday party that weekend
- wear my shower shoes in public
- currently have 4 different candles burning
- spent $300 at target in 20 minutes
- can’t eat red meat
- part viking
- spray perfume in my hair so it smells good
- i’ve had an open, half-drinken topo chico seltzer can on my desk for the last 3 weeks & i use it to take my meds in the morning bc it’s the closest thing to me
- my teeth are fake
- bit a nurse when she was trying to give me an iv
- was one of the only swine flu cases in florida
- one leg is 1.5 inches longer than the other so i fall over easily
- can’t take vitamin c supplements without breaking into hives
- shattered both my knee caps back to back
- snowboarding > skiing
- been dying my hair since i was 12
- spend $2,000 in an hour because i was depressed
- drinks tequila like water
- my doctors call me a “medical mystery”
- my roommate has become my second mother
- i eat foods i’m allergic too & then complain i don’t feel good
- stayed quiet when my cousin was about to send me into anaphylaxis shock because i didn’t want to be rude
- decorate for christmas in october
candidly caroline 